Dhoom (Sanjay Gadhvi, 2004)

I will have far less to say about Dhoom than I will the other two movies I have written about today. This is built on a combination of the fact that it is far less interesting, and that I have already expended most of my writerly energies on the other two articles. Dhoom is, in its own way, an embodiment of adolescent machismo. A super cop faces off against a super criminal in an increasingly outrageous pissing contest about who is more intelligent, manly and awesome. Occasionally, this results in satisfying moments of ridiculous, music video-esque action sequences. At other times, it results in long, unbearably dull verbal one-upmanship, or the threat to at some point in the future one-up the other. A lot of the dialogue in this movie is based on John Abraham, the villain, and Abhishek Bachchan, the hero, telling each other how much better they are than the other. The rest is Bachchan and Uday Chopra exchanging buddy cop cliches, as Chopra, far more buff and good-looking than his awful haircut and endless biker headbands give him credit for, provides comic relief as the guy who falls in love with women immediately, but never manages to snag one (until the end).

Having already seen the sequel, Dhoom 2, which is an upgrade in almost every way, this was an unexpectedly flat experience. Aside from the few sequences mentioned above, one of which involves a motorboat being dragged along a freeway by a speeding truck, there really wasn't much going for it. Most of the dance sequences feel like turn-of-the-century MTV, with extended (and mostly boring) synchronized moves. There's very little fire or chemistry between any of the characters as they dance, resulting in something that is competent, but uninvolving. Since dancing is one of my favorite things to watch in a movie, I was surprised to find myself zoning out. Other than a car mechanic in the rain bit, I actually can barely remember what the other dance sequences were (only a day after watching it). I don't know, there really isn't much to say. It is a movie built completely on the idea of style over substance, in which all the substance is owed to other famous action movies, such as Michael Mann's Heat (and a weird Casablanca reference at the end). But, in this case, the style isn't exciting or ridiculous enough to hold much attention.